Sunday, January 8, 2012

3.5 years of learning. Chapter 1- The science of offensive behavior.

Alright, so here I am blogging after 3.5 years! Last time when I blogged, I was in the final year of my MBA course. I don't know if it's my memory or it's a natural way our brain records fine details of a particular moment, but I seem to remember what state of my mind was emotionally, what aspirations I had, and what other expectations I had from the future, all at the time of my last blog.
Okay, coming to what I actually wanted to talk about is what I have learned about human behavior all this while. I am no psychology major but I have observed and continue to observe and have realized that behind every offensive "attitude", there are always some reasons. So, if you meet such people who offend/belittle/are rude to you without any reasons, it means you are definitely doing something better than them . Sure, it feels bad when someone does that to you and you are too taken aback to give a cutting reply. There is no reason to self-doubt or regret not answering back. It's absolutely normal for the people who are happy with themselves. The answering-back thing comes with a little pratice.
It is important to remember that human brain is not wired to be offensive without any reason. If someone is offensive, it is in fact defense. Defense against his/her own insecurity. The intrinsic need to tell him/herself that he/she is superior to the person that offense is inflicted on.
So never mind if certain people are not good to you because you are the one who actually makes them nervous with something good which you have and they do not.
Then you would also encounter some people who would make fun of you. Especially when there are other people around. This species is the one that need reassurance by other people. When they pull a joke on a person and make others laugh, they very well know that they are being offensive to the "victim". But that was never their purpose. Their purpose was to feel appreciated and acknowledged. This need arises when the person is insecure about some aspect of his personality so she/he uses a 'victim' to make him/herself feel good.
So when you are the victim, either you laugh out because you genuinely think it was funny. But it was kind of mean and not making much sense, you think of a come-back reply.
But remember always, the problem lies in the person who is offensive!